Thursday, February 12, 2009


As a part of All-Star weekend in Phoenix, TNT has put together a game of H-O-R-S-E. Kevin Durant, OJ Mayo and Joe Johnson will be the participants. The rules are like when you played back in the day, except no dunking is allowed. Well, then, it’s exactly like when you used to play.

The current edition of the Magic has some pretty interesting players who could probably take one of these competitions. Rashard can shoot it from anywhere and we’ve been told for several years now that JJ can knock it down too. But what if we didn’t limit it to the 08-09 Magic but included all the men who were so lucky enough to put on a Magic uni? So, without further ado, here is the Magic’s all-time H-O-R-S-E matchup and how it might play out.

Tracy McGrady: Back in the day when he could dunk and run the entire length of the floor, Tracy was disgusting. When he was on his game he could pull up from anywhere and it was going in. Remember his 62? Baseline jumper, reverse layup, 3 pointer, half court bomb, turnaround bank. Count um’.

Dennis Scott: 3D could play also. Of course he could hit the 3, but he could hit it when it counted too. I’d imagine him starting off with a 3 from about 10 feet past the line and moving in close for some hook shots which might actually be kind of tough since it would require movement. Following the competition Mr. Scott could drop some rhymes or something.

Hedo Turkoglu: Hedo is the wildcard here. Sometimes he can’t throw it in the ocean, but when he’s on he’ll hit it from outside like the game winners against Portland this year and Boston last year, and he’ll throw in all sorts of silly fadeaways that he should not even be shooting in the first place. He is also creative enough to come up with some tricky shots that others might have never thought of.

Honorable Mention: They are only using 3 guys on Saturday, so I’m only going to put 3 Magic players in our little competition. There were some other guys that came close to making the list. Scott Skiles could probably bounce pass a few balls in the basket, and if not, just beat the shit out of the other two players. Morlon Wiley would be able to stick around. Lord knows he has found a way to stick around for the last 20 years. Also, Horace Grant's first name is somewhat like horse, so he has that going for him. And finally, Shawn Kemp, because at least it would be entertaining, which is more than can be said about this silly H-O-R-S-E roster for Saturday night.

The Match: Hedo goes first. Missed 3 from 7 feet past the line. Dennis Scott hits a 15 footer while eating a double bacon cheeseburger. Tracy strains his left ring finger while getting out of his chair. He is out 4 to 5 games. Hedo makes a fadeaway 20 footer while 3D misses. However, this is bad news for Hedo as he now thinks he can make it every time. He proceeds to miss the next 7 shots he takes, and somehow commits 4 turnovers despite the fact that turnovers aren't part of H-O-R-S-E. Scott takes the match by hitting simple, fundamentally sound jump shots.

Thanks to "stangita" from flickr for the picture of the horse with a basketball on its nose.


  1. "However, this is bad news for Hedo as he now thinks he can make it every time."

    Are you sure this isn't a regular season game you're describing?

  2. lol yeah, that's funny.
    And I would expect 3D to win that, too.


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