Friday, March 20, 2009

Dwight's Other Assist

As we all know by now Dwight Howard received the NBA's Community Assist Award in the month of January and on Wednesday had a career high 7 assists against Milwaukee.

It must be pointed out though with the Knicks strolling into the Amway that one of his biggest career assists was to the other team. Nate Robinson has benefited tremendously since soaring over Dwight in the dunk contest.

Lets take a look:
  • Dime Magazine shows us that Nike gave Nate his own limited edition shoe the Nike Foamposite Lite Kryptonate.

  • Darren Rovell of CNBC shows us a photo of Nate's 80 foot billboard over Madison Square Garden which is a space that has been shared by Lebron and Lance Armstrong.

  • Within the same article we see from NBA auctions that Nate's green ball sold for $8,650 .

  • The New York Times tells us that Nate's jersey is now in the top 5 in sales at

  • New York Newsday points out that only Kobe, Lebron, Wade, and Durant have outscored Nate's 25.8 ppg since the all-star break.

  • Heck The Onion even wrote an article about Nate jumping over Dwight in everyday life.

Though the kudos and marketing oppurtunities for Nate have increased personally it has not exactly led to team success which I am sure Coach D'Antoni hopes is the next step. Either way it will be interesting to see what his value is around the league as he is a restricted free agent this summer.

With that said enjoy the game and the madness.

JJ's Ejection... What Really Happened

During the Magic's win against the Sixers back on February 28th, JJ Redick was ejected for the first time in his illustrious NBA Career. It was kind of a mystery as to why until Mr. Redick cleared the air in his blog. He wrote:

I boxed out Reggie Evans as one of his teammates shot the ball. The ball goes through the net. Evans starts running up court and after he’s about 10-15 feet away from me he turns and says something inaudible. I still don’t know what he said. I replied, “My bad, Reggie”. That’s it.

Next thing I know some ref that’s forty feet away is calling a double technical on Evans and me. I walked over calmly at first and asked him, “How can you give me a technical without knowing what was said? All I said was ‘My bad, Reggie’”. He said that he “didn’t want to hear it,” and turned his back to me. And then I said, “Well that’s stupid”. Next thing I know he tosses me out of the game. It’s the two most bogus technicals I’ve ever gotten in my life.

Hmmm. Not sure that I buy it. So, I dug into the archives and turned up the volume. What you are about to read is the actual conversation between JJ, referee Monty Mccutchen, and Reggie Evans.

Hey Reggie, how are things?
Reggie: Pretty good. Preeetttyyyy prettttttyyyy good.
JJ: So, did you get a chance to read that book I gave you?
Reggie: I did, and thank you for recommending it for me.
JJ: So what did you think? I mean, considering the tenets of Taoism, ya know, like Wu wei and scripture such as Daozang, which member of the 100 Acre Woods would you be?
Reggie: Ya know, I thought about it. I wish I could be more like Pooh and just accept life and things around me as they appear, but that is difficult. That said, I would consider myself like Piglet... Always stressed, always worrying. I think I need help with that, JJ.
JJ: That's really interesting, Reggie. Perhaps you should start with a lesson in Wu wei... "Without action." Don't disrupt the harmony that is the universe working in its own way. Place your harmony with the natural universe.
Reggie: Thanks JJ, I'm really going to work on this.
JJ: No problem!
Monty: Hey! What are you hippies talking about?
JJ: Go screw yourself.
Reggie: Yeah!
Monty: What? Double T's!
JJ: **** you!
Monty: That's it. You're ejected!

Knicks @ Magic Preview... In One Picture

The Knicks don't face off against the Magic until tomorrow night. But here is a preview of the matchup... Thanks to the genius that was Kids in the Hall.

Dwight Howard: "I crush your head."

David Lee: "Noooooooo."

Seriously, check back later for a real preview.

Sometimes things turn out great

So I friend of mine invited me to this art exhibit downtown on S Orange Ave at the Roho Art & Coffee @ CityArts Factory. I was like, girl, you know a ghost can't go to an art festival. I mean these artist types are just going to criticize my shading, lack of color or lack of inspiration. But I agreed to go and float out (us ghosts can't hang out, we just float around you know). Here I'm thinking, well I like art, but I don't like all the artsy types. What will happen? Can't I just stay outside or support you via text message? Of course not. So I showed up to give her some support. While there mingling with some of Orlando's high society and actually enjoying some of the work being shown I found a room with sports art. This got me excited and I made my way into this room. I see a bunch of cameras, video and photo, and even some professional photographers in this room. So I think, there must be something cool going on in here, or they are just trying to take pictures of this ghost floating around the room.

Well it wasn't me. Nick Anderson was in the room, hanging out with people, talking to some, taking pictures and then he went on stage. He gave a brief speech about the team. The normal PR stuff, you know, we do a lot for the community, the new arena is coming along fine, kids, Stuff, Dwight, and renew your season tickets. The artist in this room had created a limited edition Nick Anderson (the Michael Jordan steal) painting and Nick was there to sign these pieces and put them up for sale with part of it going to some charity.

Nick was really cool with everyone, joking around, posing for pictures, talking to everyone that approached him. Overall a good experience. Oh yeah Nick's son was there too. Another cool kid.

Things that I noticed about Nick. He is getting old, some grey hair is showing. He is not as tall as I thought. I mean I guess when I was 12 years old, a man that was 6'-6" or so was a giant. Not so much anymore. Oh and he has small, well let's say normal feet. I mean no Shaq size 20000 shoes.

Here's some pictures of the art being displayed. Everything was for sale. The Steal piece was $750, including frame and certificate of authenticity.


Nick Anderson posing with some dude.

Huge Hedo painting, shown in three shooting postions. The lady is covering one of them. Apparently this one was already sold to Hedo himself.

Dwight Howard. Both signed. I like the one of the winning dunk vs San Antonio. Cool Stuff

Michael Jordan in famous Dunk action. Larry Bird and all the Championship banners in the back.
I think the Jordan piece was $395, the Bird was $695.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Si no ganan hoy el mundo se acaba

El mundo del fanatico en la red. La internet nos da muchas cosas beneficiosas. Informacion, noticias, entretenimiento, y tambien estan esos sitios donde encontrar compañia adulta esos viernes por la noche, despues de una semana larga de trabajo, y sin tener energias para salir o para los que simplemente no tenemos, digo, tienen amigos con quien salir.

Los Magic perdieron contra los Lebroniers. Esta bien, fue un juego cerrado y si quitamos los pititos esos al final del juego por los refs, fue un muy buen partido peleado hasta el final. Pero que pasa, que en todos los foros y blogs esta mañana estan los fanaticos vueltos locos como si el mundo se hubiera acabado. Desde fans pidiendo el banco para Rashard Lewis a otros que quieren colgar a Stan Van Gundy por no usar a Dwight mas en el juego.

Mi gente, tomenlo con calma. El deporte es entretenimiento. Yo entiendo que como fans de un deporte, somos bien apacionados y celosos pero no queremos morir de un ataque del corazon. No es el fin del mundo. Los Magic han mejorado un mundo comparando con la temporada pasada. Hubiera sido muy bueno ganar el juego, pero simplemente no se pudo. Ahora es tiempo de seguir adelante y terminar la temporada lo mejor que se pueda. Hasta los Bulls de los 90 tuvieron que perder algunos jueguitos, asi que no se me desesperen.

Respiren profundo.

Ya te sientes mejor?

Entiendes que es solo entretenimiento?
ok, pues, es que no te queremos perder...
Disfruta el juego de hoy.

If they Don't win the World has ended

The cyber fan world that is. The internet gives us many good things. You can find information on just about anything, news, entertainment, and even some adult company for those lonely fridays after a long work week, where you don't have energy to go out and do anything or if you simply don't have any friends.

The Magic lost last night to the Lebroniers. That's ok, it was a close game, and if we take out the few miscalls by the refs in the end, it was well played. But what happened this morning, all the forums and blogs are full of fans that are about to blow their heads off. From benching Rashard Lewis to hanging Stan Van Gundy for not giving Dwight more touches.

People, take it easy. Sport is entertainment. Sure we are fans and sometimes passionate about our sport, but you don't want to have a heart attack for a loss. Its not the end of the world. The Magic have improved a lot since last season. We are young and will continue to get better. It would have been great to win the game, but its over. You can't change it. Even the Bulls in the 90's had to lose some games, so come on, it'll be all ok.

Take a deep breath.

Are you feeling better?

Do you understand that this is just entertainment?
OK, Good, we just don't want to lose you....
Now enjoy tonight's game.

The Amount of Time It Took You to Read This Title...

...was greater than the amount of time Dwight Howard spent in the lane last night during a crucial play near the end of the Magic's loss to the Cleveland Cavaliers.

Howard was whistled for a three-second violation that negated the Magic’s possession and gave the ball back to Cleveland with 30 seconds left and a two point lead.

Magic Coach Stan Van Gundy was beside himself in reaction to the call. Three-second violations are not uncommon, in general, but they are rarely called late in a close game.

“You won't see that call again. That, I guarantee you," Van Gundy said. "You will not see, with the game on the line, a 3-second call in the last 10 seconds. That's part of the reason they're 30-1 at home. They're a very good team, and when you get calls like that [expletive], you're in pretty good shape."

What made it worse is the fact that Howard was on his way out of the lane when the ref blew the whistle. So, Howard was policing himself, going by the rules, and exited the lane in the time allotted. But the ref jumped the whistle. Howard implied that their may have been some home cooking involved.

"I was very surprised," Howard said. "I was in the lane and I got out. It seemed like their bench or their coaching staff got into the ref's ear about me being in the lane. Instead of letting the refs make the call, I guess the bench made the call."

I had the game recorded on my DVR and reviewed that play over and over with my stop watch from the moment that Howard entered the lane until the moment that I could hear referee Jack Nies blow his whistle. By my measurement, the whistle was blown well before 3 seconds, in fact, it was barely past two seconds. This makes me think that the ref had been watching Howard the whole game and maybe after enough complaining from the Cavs bench, he made a conscious decision to blow his whistle right then.

The problem I have with this goes beyond the idea of “make up” calls or even placing an emphasis on when during the course of a game it is acceptable to make or not make certain calls. The idea that rules already being enforced by subjective individuals are themselves subjective is extremely consternating. But in this case, the problem is that the call was incorrect! Howard was not in the lane for three seconds. Had he clearly been in the lane for over three seconds and the ref blew the whistle, we would still be talking about the call not being appropriate at that time. But at least we would have to admit that it was the right call. But this isn’t the case. Howard was not in the lane for three seconds…not even close.

I won’t go so far as to say that this call cost us the game. Most folks in the Magic blogosphere prefer to place the focus on Rashard Lewis and his recent slump. I agree that this is a bigger issue than one call. However, it is clear to me that when two elite teams are this evenly matched, it only takes one bad call to make a difference in which team wins and which team loses.

Paging Rashard Lewis

Last night Orlando dropped a close one at Cleveland 97-93 thanks to a late Lebron 3 and 3 second call on Dwight Howard. The most disappointing aspect of last night's loss has to be the poor effort put in by big money man Rashard Lewis. Let's take a quick look at his last few games.

  • In last night's loss Rashard went 3 for 15 from the field and 0 for 8 from 3 point land. That's 6 points. He also pulled in a whopping 4 rebounds and 2 assists. Whoopy.
  • On Sunday, in a win against the Utah Jazz Mr. Lewis went 2 for 9 from the field and 0 for 6 from beyond the arch for a wonderful 5 points. However, he did manage to grab 6 rebounds and provide 4 assists. Horay.
  • In what is the statistical outlier, last week against the Wizards he posted 19 points on 6 of 13 shooting. Lewis went 3 of 9 from the 3 point line and added 6 rebounds and 2 assists. Blah.
  • And finally, against the Bulls Rashard contributed a whopping 3 points on 0 for 9 shooting... 3 of those missed shots coming from 3 point land. However, he did pull in 5 rebounds and 2 assists. Whicked.

So, let's do some math. 6 points. 5 points. 19 points. 3 points. Carry the two... That's 33 points the last 4 games. An average of 8.2 points. He has made 11 of 46 from the field and 3 of 26 from 3 point land. Barf.

As I'm sure all Magic fans know, Rashard is currently working under a lovely little 6 year, $118 million dollar contract. That's an average of just a shade under $20 million a year. That's $243,000 a game. And if you take the last four games you get an impressive $30,000 per point. Not good.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Magic at Cavs Preview

As we all know by now our very own Magic clash with the Cavs tonight in a game that is absolutely vital if the Magic have any chance of catching the Cavs for the 1 seed in the East.

Let's preview this clash of the titans.

  • Stan tells BS of the OS that of course this game is important for seeding.

  • AOL's Fanhouse has an extensive preview which states lots of neat things like the Magic's weakness at 2 guard but touting Delonte West as what makes that baby prrr.

  • Dwight Howard says the MVP is of no concern to him and his main goal is to win games. Tonight would be a fantastic start if you ask me.

  • In the USA Today preview Lebron says he is all team first and says he looks forward to tonight's challenge.

  • John Denton of Florida Today says Rashard Lewis is the player to watch for the Magic and its time for him to step up. Could not agree more John.

  • According to the Associated Press this is the Magic's best chance to prove they are title contenders. Thanks AP!

  • Stan Van Gundy compares defending Lebron to which death penalty punishment you would want from the Magic's official website.

  • To the right the Cleveland Plain-Dealer provides us with a picture of Dwight tickling Lebron on his way to the rim.

Well here is to hoping that the Magic hand Cleveland their 2nd home loss at the Q tonight. Enjoy the game everyone!

Marko Jaric and Adriana Lima... Really?

Last week Grizzly guard Marko Jaric was accused of sexual assault while his team was in Philadelphia to play the 76ers. Although, after an investigation no charges were filed, this sparked a discussion by some folks here at TPASTBM. The question: Why, considering who Marko Jaric is married to, would he put himself into a situation where someone might consider accusing him of sexual assault?

“Given the lady he has at home, he should never, ever, ever be in a situation that might allow some lady to make accusations.”

“On the road... away from home... with his teammates... regardless of whom he has at home, you know he is going out with the boys. Deep down, in the same circumstances, you know you would do the same.”

“If I had his wife I would retire to an island in the middle of nowhere... And never be seen again.”

“Hah, but that is you, and your current circumstances... Now, imagine if you will, being a professional athlete and making a ton of money for playing a game. Imagine the way people have treated you all your life, boosting your ego, hanging on, wanting theirs, imagine the women that have thrown themselves at you time and time again to get a slice of your pie (and giving up a slice of their, uhm, pie). Imagine how different the world would look to you. Imagine how different your views would be. Now, throw it all out the window and forget about it completely. Without living that, I don't honestly think any of us can begin to understand these things.”

“There's a reason that Jaric (and just about every other star with money) is married to a Brazilian supermodel. He has ridiculously hot girls throwing themselves at him on practically a nightly basis. I would like to think that I could be faithful under those circumstances but truth be told I don't know how I would react. I think if you guys were truly honest with yourselves you would come to the same conclusion.”

“I believe that your inability to actually consider the situation from his point of view in this matter pushes you to this position. You are placing yourself into a situation that, quite frankly, you would never find yourself in, and trying to imagine what you would do based on who you are as a person. I submit, that you cannot put yourself in his situation, without disregarding who you are as a person, and considering who he is, or who you would be, had you gone through life in similar circumstances.”

“I don't care about being a pro athlete and ****....He is not Dwight, Kobe or Lebron...He is Marco Jaric the luckiest man in the NBA, at least when it comes to wives....He is not a great player, he is OK. He doesn't have the millions and millions that others have, and with those lifestyles, you need a lot. I wouldn't be surprised if she has more money than him.”

“Sure if YOU have that at home YOU love her and stay away from trouble. But... that's YOU and you are who you are because of your life experiences. I would say that your life experiences are vastly different from his, and it is impossible to distill this down into something as simple as you guys try to make it out to be. If you are LUCKY enough to have that... Is it luck in his case? I would say that it is not. I would say that he has had more than his fair share of ridiculously attractive women throw themselves at him. At the same time, you are also leaving out the fact that she, most likely, has an equally disgusting amount of men trying to get into her pants. Just how many guys has she slept with to get where she is? Completely sexist, I know, but also a very high probability of being spot on.”

“Jaric has an insane contract. He is doing quite well for himself. You don't have to convince me that she is insanely hot (but I do appreciate the friendly reminder). If I was married to her I would never leave the house. It’s not the same circumstances though with him. We can't even begin to imagine what it’s like to resist the temptations that he goes through on a nightly basis. Here's a question for you married guys. If this girl approached you on the road and started hitting on you....what would your reaction be? Would you be able to resist her? Now multiply that by a 100 on a nightly basis and tell me you could do it.”

“Ok, so I guess if I'm Marko Jaric then I do put myself in the same situation. What's your point? Going by what you said there isn't room for any discussion.”

“I guess I'm in the minority of general male thinking. If I got married, I did it for a reason, despite what might be thrown my way. If I wanted to be single and sleep with chicks every night on the road, or even entertain the idea, then I wouldn't have gotten married to begin with. To think like an NBA player like you've mentioned, I would think about the financial ramifications of my actions as well. Simple as that.”

“No, you aren't in the minority. I actually feel the same way. I have been married. I have been in a situation where someone was throwing themselves at me, but I still turned it down. I had a co-worker, who was several years younger than I was, was a couple degrees more attractive than my wife at the time, and wanted nothing more than to fool around at and after work a few times. What I am saying is that your value structure, what marriage means to you would be significantly different if you were in his shoes, if you had grown up in similar circumstances. Look at Hollywood as an example. The divorce rate is ridiculous. Marriage isn't sacred, it's a tool, it's a step to get people somewhere. It can be a great career move, a stepping stone to another level. I'm not saying everyone is like this, there are some lengthy marriages between people in this realm, but I think those are by far the one offs, not the norms. Ever look at some of those people and just think that they are completely out of touch with reality? Guess what? They are! They are completely out of touch with OUR reality. Just as we are out of touch with theirs.”

Monday, March 16, 2009

Music Monday

In honor of last night's victory over the Utah Jazz, let's go with perhaps the best hip hop group of all time... A Tribe Called Quest. Here it is, Jazz(We've Got) & Buggin' Out.

We got the jazz
Stern firm and young with a laid-back tongue
The aim is to succeed and achieve at 21
Just like Ringling Brothers, I'll daze and astound
Captivate the mass, cause the prose is profound
Do it for the strong, we do it for the meek
Boom it in your boom it in your boom it in your Jeep
Or your Honda or your Beemer or your Legend or your Benz
The rave of the town to your foes and your friends
So push it, along, trails, we blaze
Don't deserve the gong, don't deserve the praise
The tranquility will make ya unball your fist
For we put hip-hop on a brand new twist
A brand new twist with the homie-alistic
So low-key that ya probably missed it
And yet it's so loud that it stands in the crowd
When the guy takes the beat, they bowed
So raise up squire, address your attire
We have no time to wallow in the mire
If you're on a foreign path, then let me do the lead
Join in the essence of the cool-out breed
Then cool out to the music cuz it makes ya feel serene
Like the birds and the bees and all those groovy things
Like getting stomach aches when ya gotta go to work
Or staring into space when you're feeling berserk
I don't really mind if it's over your head
Cuz the job of resurrectors is to wake up the dead
So pay attention, it's not hard to decipher
And after the horns, you can check out the Phifer

Competition, dem Phifer come sideway
But competition, dey mus' me come straightway
Competition, dem Phifer come sideway
But competition, dey mus' come straightway
Hows about that, it seems like it's my turn again
All through the years my mike has been my best friend
I know some brothers wonder, can Phifer really kick it?
Some even wanna dis me, but why sweat it?
I'm all into my music cuz it's how I make papes
Tryin' to make hits, like Kid Capri makes tapes
Me sweat another? I do my own thing
Strictly hardcore tracks, not a new jack swing
I grew up as a Christian so to Jah I give thanks
Collect my banks, listen to Shabba Ranks
I sing, and chat, I do all of that
It's 1991 and I refuse to come wack
I take off my hat to other crews that intend to rock
But the Low End Theory's here, it's time to wreck shop
I got Tip and Shah, so whom shall I fear
Stop look and listen, but please don't stare
So jet to the store, and buy the LP
On Jive/RCA, cassettes and CD's
Produced and arranged by the four-man crew
And oh shit, Skiff Anselm, he gets props too
Make sure you have a system with some phat house speakers
So the new shit can rock, from Mars to Massapequa
Cuz where I come from quality is job one
And everybody up on Linden know we get the job done
So peace to that crew, and peace to this crew
Bring on the tour, we'll see you at a theater nearest you

Hey yo but wait, back it up, hup, easy back it up
Please let the Abstract embellish on the cut
Back and forth just like a Cameo song
If you dig this joint then please come dance along
To the music cuz it's done just for the rhyme
Now I gotta scat and get mine, underline
The jazz, the what? The jazz can move that ass
Cuz the Tribe originates that feelin' of pizzazz
It's the universal sound, best to brothers underground
In the one-six below, ya didn't have to go
Some say that I'm a sinner cuz I once had an orgy
And sometimes for breakfast I eat grits and porgies
If this is a stinker, then call me a stink, I ask
"What? What? What?" - now check it out
All my peoples in Queens ya don't stop
Now all my peoples in Brooklyn ya don't stop
And all my peoples uptown ya don't stop
That includes the Bronx a' Harlem ya don't stop
Now to that girl Ramelle ya don't stop
I say because Ladies First ya don't stop
And to the JB's, ya don't stop
And De La Soul, ya don't stop
To my Brand Nubians ya don't stop
And to my Leaders of the New ya don't stop
To my man Large Professor ya don't stop
Pete Rock for the beat ya don't stop
Everybody in the place ya don't stop
Ya keep it on, to the rhythm, ya don't stop
And last but not least on the sure shot
It's the Zulu nation

That's right. We got the Jazz.

Thanks to elyrics for the kickin' rhymes.

Happy Monday!

Orlando had a pretty good weekend, picking up a win on the road against the Wizards on Friday night and putting it to the tired Utah Jazz last night. Here's some highlights:

And let's see what the internet has to say.

Yahoo! Sports - NBA - Orlando Magic News

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Credit "Sebi" from the Orlando Magic Message board for the title graphic.

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